Depression Rescue

By Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.

A few months ago Gillian felt lifeless, dead inside and uninterested in anything. Everything was an effort. She just wanted to sleep. She suffered bouts of constipation. She didn’t want to meet anyone, prepare food for herself or take care of her dog. She couldn’t go to work. Her words came out slow and with long pauses in between. The words were flat, without expression -just like she felt. She couldn’t even cry. Nothing touched her and she moved like a robot from her bed to the shower to a chair and back to bed again. She didn’t care about anything or anyone. This was not the Gillian she knew or wanted to be. She had always been driven to work hard, please those around her and then earn her rest. She had been very sociable and knew how to have a good time.

Now Gillian is very angry and tearful. She cries easily when memories of past hurtful relationships invade her as if from nowhere. She complains of being exhausted and resents having to go to work. She is impatient with herself and others when problems don’t get sorted out quickly. Anything in her immediate environment that has a glitch feels like another burden on her shoulders. Nothing feels right and that makes her furious. She has enough of her own stuff to deal with. When the world outside also has ‘problems’ it makes Gillian want to give up bothering to face the day at all…

Working and being busy no longer protected her from her past wounding experiences. Her back and neck pain interrupted her sleep. Skin eruptions came and went. It was as if she had lost control and is the unwilling victim of her history. She was reliving that history and it was unbearable. She wanted to get back to being in total control and able to glide through life as before. Having to interact with a car that breaks down, a dog that barks to be taken for a walk, and an insurance companies that refuse to reimburse her for necessary expenses made her crazy. She was irritable, short tempered, unable to wait her turn in lines at the bank or supermarkets. Her interface with the world became brittle, drained of any juice and fractured.

As time went on Gillian’s anger seemed to subside. It had robbed her of space to feel any joy, excitement, softness or empathy. As she pushed it down again for the millionth time, she became more able to function in her job and did the bare minimum to take care of herself and her dog. While she slept for longer periods it wasn’t refreshing and didn’t give her the oblivion she wanted.

She felt disenchanted with her colleagues and friends. Even when friends gave her what she wanted it didn’t register. It was as if she was still starving. The only thing that appeared to satisfy her if only temporarily was food. She would eat and eat when she was alone at home. It calmed her from the moment she began to get the food to the last bite. It was the one sure way she could give herself some peace from her disappointment with others, their unreliability, their ingratitude and inability to satisfy her. She began to put on weight and whipped herself with criticism and loathing. When the self-flagellation became too much to endure she would gorge on food and then drink lots of water, stick her fingers down her throat and throw up. If she got most of it out, she could approve of herself and get a break from the harsh judgments. If she couldn’t vomit it up then she would be consumed with guilt. She continued this cycle of emptiness, bingeing, crucifying herself, attempting to vomit, taking pride in herself if it was successful and drowning in guilt if not. Gillian tolerated this life since it was preferable to the risks she had to take if she allowed herself to be open to relationships. At least this cycle was in her control and familiar. She was the slave master and the slave. Better than being someone else’s victim with repercussions that last forever.

Gillian’s depression had at least four heads. It came in waves. From a sense of lifelessness she would shift to being full of uncomfortable emotions like anger. Hair like triggers would set off bouts of crying that would sap her and make her numb again. When the emptiness came she would fill herself with food that put on weight and that set up a binge, guilt and purge rotation. Each head of the depression acted separately with little communication among them. Each head ruled for a time and then relinquished its power to the next head. Gillian finally came to grips with what she wanted from life when all four heads were vying for supremacy at the same time. Each squeaked a little but didn’t get top billing. They were all dying off, and Gillian was challenged to find out what the costs and consequences were for her of accepting empathy, generosity and care without obligation. It wasn’t till all parts of her got ’sick’ that she was forced to face the inevitable.

Terry thrived on work. He got a buzz from the autonomy his managerial position gave him. He could work when he wanted and felt important taking on extra responsibility. He was always ready to stand in for other colleagues when they were sick or on vacation. He would think nothing of doing his job and that of a sick employee simultaneously. He was well paid and could afford the nice things in life. He had a girlfriend and took satisfaction in being able to buy her expensive gifts. However there were times when he wondered what all this was for. He never had time to enjoy his money in a leisurely way. He never took time off, never got sick and had no long term plans for settling down.

After years of living mostly for the ‘high’ that work gave him, Terry began to feel more tired than usual. He forced himself to continue performing at the same level as before, but his body protested. His concentration span became shorter and he found himself having to ask people to repeat themselves. He read things two or three times before he absorbed the information. He realized he was less alert when driving when he hit a car as he parked near his apartment.

Terry thought this was just a phase and he tried to make sure that he got plenty of sleep. But it made no difference. He was dragging himself up in the morning and falling asleep before he could eat his dinner at night. He would go long periods without eating when he was absorbed in the fast pace of work. He was worried about the difference he noticed in himself and tried working even harder to compensate. He never took breaks and delegated fewer tasks. He had no feeling for the issues his work force brought to him which was unusual for him. He went to a medical doctor to find out why his energy was flagging. All test results were normal, and he was told to ensure a good balanced diet with regular meals.

Terry became alarmed when other people commented on the changes within him. He had no idea that it could be so obvious. He couldn’t bear that his ‘weaknesses’ were visible. His whole image of himself was under threat. The harder he tried to return to his former self, the worse his performance and functioning became. When the first set of wake up calls didn’t lead him to take a good look at what he was doing to himself, the spiral downward came faster and with greater force. He was no longer eager to answer calls from work to bail them out, do shifts for others or sort out difficulties other managers left behind. He didn’t want to have to find time to go out with his girl friend. He didn’t want to deal with paying for the car he hit when he was sleepy at the wheel. When his body demanded extended amounts of sleep, he had to give in and take a few days off work. He had to be ’sick’ before he felt he could legitimately separate himself from work.

He got angry with his body for failing him. He was disgusted with himself for having to call in sick and for having to rely on others to do his job. He worried that he would have to do it all again since no one could do it like him. He hated depending on his girlfriend for shopping and housecleaning when he was too weak to do it himself. He didn’t answer calls offering comfort or understanding. He hated the time he got to ‘feel’ himself.

Unfortunately for Terry, as soon as he felt a little more energy he went back to his old ways with a stronger sense of fervor. He was determined to compensate for the time off and wanted to prove to himself and everyone else that he was the same reliable superman. He was terrified that if he showed himself to be as human as anyone else, he would be denied promotion and became ordinary, with a non-descript life. That wouldn’t serve the voice inside him that said he had to achieve at the highest levels at all costs or else he was a failure and hence unlovable. The time periods between his normal functioning and depressions became shorter. The depressions themselves became longer, forcing him to examine his life style and what he expected of himself. What he found was that he was terrified that he was really trash, and that he had used the status of work, the money it provided and the time it used up as a costume to hide the garbage.

Terry’s depression had three heads. He catapulted from lack of concentration and sluggishness to self-disgust and anger, followed by being shut down. As in Gillian’s case the heads led independent lives and controlled him. He thought he was in control but it was exactly the opposite.

Having many heads to your depression provides extra places to go when one head is tired and used up. As it replenishes itself with your self-hatred and critical voice you can sap the energy of another head. Eventually none of the heads will have the chance to recover. They will all shrivel up and crumble. You have to feel all the trash, and smell the stink. It is truly awful, but the best news ever. Without feeling, smelling and tasting the parts of yourself you have ignored, you are going to stay depressed – each head waxing and waning through your life.

Depression at its worst is a gift that your are given so that you can be your own master. No more do you have to live according to those voices inside you that won’t allow you to be human, and deprive you of the simple pleasures of life. You get to plan and build in your time, take pleasure and pride in your work and be comfortable in your own skin. For those who need to go through the fires of depression with its many heads, there is a treasure at the end that is not found in any other way. It is the authentic you, that you can accept and be proud of.

Imagine having the chance to build your own self your way. How exciting and thrilling! You can be the architect, give the planning permission, act as your own contractor and inspector, buy your own materials and construct the best you that you want to be. This does not mean that you cannot get relief from medications. If used in conjunction with the work you do to feel all parts of yourself no matter how distasteful, you can construct a stronger and more resilient person. One that you will like and others too.

Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D., practices counseling and therapy in LA and helps individuals and couples with relationship issues and anger. Jeanette is available here: http://www.goodtherapy.org/San-Jose-therapy.htm

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Jeanette_Raymond,_Ph.D. http://EzineArticles.com/?How-Many-Heads-Does-Your-Depression-Have?&id=1302602

Tags: depression, mental health, therapy

by Greg Katz

We always associate peer pressure with negative attributes. The myth of peer pressure is that it drives us to do things that are not in our best interest. Let’s reframe peer pressure and see how it can serve you in improving your health and help you develop your inner illness warrior. Recent research by David Spiegel at Stanford University shows that although support groups don’t increase longevity, they do increase the quality of life of participants.

The most likely place to engage peer pressure following an illness diagnosis is a support group. Most organizations have disease specific groups so that the members have a common ground and language. One of the aspects of a support group is that its admission is rolling so people leave and new people enter the group so you have varying levels of experience with the illness. Here’s some ways that peer pressure in the group can improve your health.

Creating Options and Alternatives

No matter how much research we do we won’t be able to discover every treatment option, alternative therapies or allied health resources related to our illness. Everyone’s interests will differ so if you’re more inclined to research natural remedies, someone else in group may be looking at clinical trials for new allopathic treatments. It’s this opportunity to create a treatment buffet that broadens your options in planning for treatment. There is an increased likelihood that we’ll follow through on treatment when we have more information about options and alternatives. Having the power of choice that is instigated by members of the group is empowering.

Making Decisions

Having others in a group who are ahead of you in the treatment process is a gift. You don’t have to re-invent the wheel. You don’t have blaze any new trails. All you have to do is get the information both factual and anecdotal and make informed decisions. The members of your group will offer their input but it’s not a prescription, it’s only their experience. The members of the group are like a living pro and con list offering you the triumphs and tragedies that come with specific treatments. Take the information and use it to make treatment choices that fit your life and your end goal correlating with your definition of wellness or health.

Keeping You On Track

One of the great assets of belong to a support group is that once you make a decision and announce it to the world you have group that will hold accountable for your actions. You will be asked about how your implementing the treatment plan and how it’s impacting your day-to-day life. They aren’t trying to bully you, but the simple truth is that compliance with treatment regimens increases your chances at recovery. You don’t get to pick and choose the days you take your medication, it’s non-negotiable.

By joining a support group you enlist your own illness army. The information available to you is priceless. You can cut a lot of time off your learning curve about coping with illness from those who are ahead of you on their own journey to wellness.

Looking for other ways to shorten your learning curve on coping with illness? Get your FREE copy of our special report “The 5 Pillars of Health and Healing” and as a special gift you’ll receive our audiovisual program “Instilling Hope for Health”. It’s available right now and it’s FREE at http://www.survivingstrong.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Greg_Katz http://EzineArticles.com/?Health-Crisis?–3-Reasons-to-Join-a-Support-Group&id=1324798

Tags: Illness and Depression, Support Groups

by Zuske Sagara

Something in modern society is pushing more and more people to experience clinical depression. The statistics differ, but a rough estimate of 20% is considered accurate for the population of the US. The time period for the depression is generally not very long, but that does not mean it is not a danger. The number of people who have experienced clinical depression has never been this high before. The fact that depression brings about a number of dangerous side effects, such as insomnia, only makes the numbers that much more worrying. There are studies focused on finding the cause of the increasing number of clinically depressed people, but are comparatively less studies focused on finding ways to alleviate the problem.

Perhaps the lack of studies dedicated to treating depression stems from the fact that there are already anti-depressants on the market that are effective. At least, they’re effective according to the statistics. As for the common side effects, there are sleeping pills that can help with insomnia. There are also drugs that can be used to treat most of the physical side effects associated with depression. However, these drugs tend to be difficult to obtain over-the-counter, which puts things into an interesting situation. Most people tend not to recognize by themselves that they are experiencing depression, which means that while they might treat the side effects, they’re ignoring the heart of the matter. In addition, not all of the side effects of depression are treatable by medications, such as the changes in body temperature.

Another problem is that the side effects have a tendency to form a vicious cycle that makes prolonged depression worsen. For example, one of the common causes of depression comes in the form of anxiety disorders, typically social anxiety. It has been documented that social anxiety can worsen with the onset of depression, sometimes resulting in total social withdrawal for short intervals. In another tangent, insomnia – another common side effects – can also worsen a person’s depressed state. As the lack of sleep starts to interfere with the patient’s already shaky ability to perform socially and professionally, the already-fragile self-confidence starts to fracture even more. This can cause the person’s already shaky state of mental health to be damaged to the breaking point, possibly resulting in a total nervous breakdown.

However, some people have also made the mistake of connecting insomnia directly to depression. While being depressed can have physical effects on the body that can trigger insomnia, it is by no means the absolute cause. According to most studies on the matter, insomnia is a physical condition, one that is more likely to be affected by factors such as a person’s diet than an anxiety disorder. However, the popular perception that insomnia is linked to depression can sometimes cause a person to develop the latter. There are several factors that have to be considered, such as whether or not the insomnia has caused a dip in the person’s social standing, but the connection is a possibility.

A common effect of both depression and insomnia is the unusual body temperature that both conditions cause. In a normal human body, the body temperature rises and falls depending on a number of factors. Physical activity, environmental factors, and even intense mental activity can cause changes in the body temperature of a normal person. However, depression and insomnia patients both exhibit signs that their body temperatures remain flat regardless of internal or external factors. This only furthers the connection that people make between the two conditions, which can sometimes make one problem lead to another.

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Article Source: http://www.articledashboard.com/Article/The-Vicious-Cycle-Of-Depression-And-Insomnia/310156

Tags: anxiety disorders, depression, insomnia, mental health, side effects, sleeping pill, social anxiety

by Franchis

There is a serious problem in the world today. Well, there are a lot. But the one I would like to address is how we react to mental illnesses. How many people out in the world react to hearing of a mental illness with negativity? There are a lot more than will admit to discrimination.

It is a terrible thing to discriminate against anyone for a lot of the things that are stigmatized, such as race, creed, mental illnesses or personality traits. Many people struggle with such discriminations everyday. We as humans should have learned by now that we are all the same, but we haven’t. How many of us with mental illnesses have withheld that information from people, even friends or family, for fear of discrimination? I know I have. And I know many who do. I have had many people ask me what is wrong with me, or wonder why I can’t leave the house some days. My answer is usually that I have a headache, a killer migraine, and I can’t leave the house. Why? Why do we tend to make excuses for our actions, or lack thereof? Because of the reactions.

I once had someone say to me, ‘Watch out for that person, they are schizophrenic.’ Now how fair is that? That’s like saying ‘Hide your cake, he’s diabetic.’ When people find out I’m on medication, the looks I get are incredible. So many people think mental illnesses or personality traits are ‘all in your head,’ and not literally speaking, but as though we make it up. But people need to realize that mental illnesses and personality traits are real. Just because you do not always see scars, or see those with such illnesses and traits going for surgery, or being told they have three months to live, does not make them any less real.

We need to raise awareness to these issues, and address them with open minds. The best way to start this, in my opinion, is to learn about them. Talk about them. If you know someone with a mental illness or personality trait, talk to them. Don’t discriminate. I’ve seen OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) treated as though it is contagious. I have seriously been asked if Bipolar Disorder is contagious. Yes, it is, right up there with hiccups.

Racial matters have been an issue almost since the beginning of time, as we developed in our different lands, and it is still an ongoing issue. That goes the same for discriminating against religion or sexual orientation. Look at the discrimination. Now, personality traits and mental illnesses are starting to come out of the closet. So, how do you plan on addressing them?

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Article Source: http://www.articledashboard.com/Article/Discrimination-Can-Cause-Mental-Illnesses/310131

Tags: discrimination, mental illnesses, personality disorders

by Ken Jensen

Bipolar disorder tests your mettle as a human being. It takes you to the utmost limits of your psychic endurance. Oftentimes, your physical parameters are maxed out too. If you are healthy but supporting a sick person you’d do well to understand the depth of agony it brings into that sufferer’s life. This is no small thing and you must respect that. You may find yourself adopting a whole new outlook in caring for your loved one. It’s a “know thine enemy” kind of a thing.

Here are some aspects of that enemy:

- Stress that cannot be measured. This is how my really active bipolar years started out. I felt stressed. Nothing a toke of weed or a cigarette couldn’t fix in the beginning. But this stress began to grow. It took less and less to annoy me. It took less and less to irritate me. My patience practically bled out before my eyes as I watched.

Every life issue in my world was a now major one to me. Chances were this was not the case prior to my illness kicking in full force. The sources were innumerable: I couldn’t keep a job; I hated any job I currently held; too many bills not enough money; not enough freedom in my life; everyone on the street and in their cars was a dirty word to me; cops bothered me – just their presence.

None of my plans ever worked out; my marriage sucked; I developed health problems that compounded my negative mental state; my meds never helped so all the doctors sucked; my neighbors sucked; the world’s problems felt like they were my own; my erratic behavior upset those close to me causing me even more stress.

The stuff I’d pull when manic would leave a pile of problems in its wake that I could not repair causing double stress – the problem was a nightmare and it was all my fault so now add self hatred to the list; nobody understood me; I was arrested more than once and the legal issues and fines crushed the heart out of me and kept me terminally pissed off; my depression and dissociative symptoms stressed me as well… on and on and on.

This is just some of what your bipolar friend next to you may be feeling. It’s not always visible. We’re good at bottling it all up and cramming it into that little black knot in our guts. And many times the sick person is incapable of translating his or her feelings and emotions into words the non-afflicted would comprehend.

The symptoms get so weird at times that they are new even to the person feeling them. There is no way they’d ever get those around them to understand.This then adds mountains of more stress to the heap they’re already carrying. They are truly alone in this fight and they know it. The isolation is stressful beyond belief. Their own mind is their prison.

- Sleeping disorders. These just come with the package. Panic hits in your sleep and you awaken as if in a mortar attack during war time and with just the same amount of fear. It happens night after night, sometimes more than once each night. Your sleep is never deep. You fear even going to sleep because you know the panic is waiting for you.

The massive depression that hits a bipolar person also messes up your sleep. You sleep but your mind is not reaching that REM zone it needs to repair itself. You sleep 10, 12, 14 hours a night or maybe multiple days at a time only to wake up exhausted. There is no longer any true relief to be had from a night’s sleep.

Mania alone can keep you up for days. You don’t feel any need for sleep or not all that much compared to normal. Your mind runs like a car in first gear with the gas pedal to the floor. You mentally eat yourself alive. Eventually you motor down and if you’re lucky sleep will be had. Then again, maybe you slide the other way into depression and start working the other side of the fence as I wrote above. At the very least, the panic is still lurking nearby. There’s no way to tell. It just comes as it comes.

This then leads to sleep meds. Most of these are addictive and bring their own set of new malfunctions in the making to the mix. Many times they don’t work. I went through every OTC and prescribable drug my doc was willing to give me in an attempt to get a good night’s sleep. Know what happens if you eat too many (because none of them were working as in my case)? Psychosis. You and reality part ways. You’re up and about doing something but nobody’s manning the bridge. And you’re probably not doing a something that would make you proud in your more lucid state.

I experienced this more than once as I sleepwalked through portions of my days. I was pretty damn ashamed of what my family told me I’d done later, too. I remembered nothing.

After a few months of experimentation I never ate sleeping pills again.

But I did find a way out of all this mess. It may seem impossible to you if your life right now matches what mine did then. But believe me. It’s true. I know because I did it. You can too.

Ken Jensen is the author of “It Takes Guts To Be Me: How An Ex-Marine Beat Bipolarism”. Sign up for his free newsletter: www.ittakesgutstobeme.com

Article Source: http://www.articledashboard.com/Article/Ya-need-a-challenge?-Try-being-bipolar-for-a-day/312157

Tags: bipolar, depression, disorder, ex, health, jensen, ken, manic, marine, mental